Thursday, June 5, 2008

Around the League

Tysons Pioneer Two Loss Game
--The Louisville Tysons made baseball history by losing the first two loss game the Cobb World record books. When asked how this was possible, Tysons GM mhoffa explained, "I made a bet with the league commissioner that the Tysons would take two losses for their next loss if David Archuleta didn't win American Idol. Obviously I missed that boat, just like when I voted for Justin Guarini in season 1." Now the Tysons have seen their division lead shrink to 6 games over the slumping Jackson Pollocks, and 7 over the Huntington Hillbillies as a result.

No Hitters Lead to Backyard Brawl
--Carson Russell of the Charlotte Dogs and B.C. Steenstra of the Omaha Sluggers were involved in an altercation at a Charlotte playground after Steenstra was called out by Russell for several comments he made after his no-no. The bad blood started when after his dominating performance three days after Russells game, Steenstra said to the press, "My no hitter could beat up Russel's no hitter." Russell didn't take that comment kindly and told reporters, "Oh yeah, well my no hitter could kick his no hitters ass!" Then Russell had a glove slap fed exed to Omaha to challenge Steenstra to a backyard brawl at the local 37th street playground. Fortunately management for both teams found out about the impending fight and corralled their pitchers before they could cause each other season ending injuries.

Playoff Roster Time in Santa Fe
--Reports out of Santa Fe confirmed that the Heat Wave will be sending the vast majority of their talent to their Rookie League team, which is the only team in the franchise that has a winning record and a chance at playoff glory. "The players will still be getting paid, so they don't care where they play," said Bench Coach Hipolito Rios. When asked how he felt about being shifted down to the Rookie league, veteran pitcher Chad Gorecki was actually excited. "I'm sure I'll dominate the hell out of those high school chumps, and it will be nice to pad my record. Plus the pranks are better down in the rooks anyways," exclaimed Gorecki. Fans of the Heat Wave's rookie squad are buying tickets by the dozens in anticipation of the talent surge.

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