Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Squidvicious Presents Sid Vicious!

Chuck Biscuits - Cobb Times Herald

The Jackson Pollocks have announced their promotional schedule for season 7, and without a doubt the highlight is Squidvicious Presents Sid Vicious night at Boon Stadium. Retired professional wrestler and master of the powerbomb "Psycho" Sid Vicious will be in the house on opening day to sign autographs, pump the team and fans up, and perhaps teach them a few moves. "I thought that this might be a good way to reach out to our fan base in Mississippi, where pro wrestling remains popular despite all of the steroid scandals," said the Pollocks PR Manager.

As part of the promotion, the first 3000 fans will get a Sid Vicious bobblehead. One lucky fan will also be drawn to compete against Mr. Vicious in a strongman contest during the seventh inning stretch for the chance to win season tickets.

In addition Pitching Coach Rex Simpson was lobbying to get Sid Vicious to teach the staff how to properly execute the powerbomb in the event they get charged while on the mound by opposing hitters. "I would much rather have a Kyle Farnsworth than a Paul Wilson on the mound, if you know what I mean," said Simpson.

The Pollocks PR manager also said that it is a shame that Sex Pistols frontman Sid Vicious was dead, because "he would have performed one heck of a national anthem." In addition to Sid Vicious night, other notable promotions include Polish Sausage night, Abstract Expressionist Pizza and Paint night, and a pre-game Pork Rind professional eating contest.

4 comments:

mrploppie said...

After the game come on down to Nestor's Bar and Grill 23 Fake St. in downtown Jackson and listen to Squidvious. Their music is influenced by surf, space, spy, spaghetti western, and prog.
$5.00 cover charge at door.

Bibliotron said...

It is part of a twin bill with Man or Astroman? also performing!

squidvicious said...

I'm just glad there's a couple folks out there that appreciate (it is appreciation?!) all these references!

Bibliotron said...

Of course it is appreciation. I was nearly an art minor in college, and worked in an opera house. It is nice to see some intelligent references rather than the usual Cleveland Cleveland Warriors kind of junk! But I wonder, which Sid Vicious are you a fan of? Both had their moments.